Like Jason Bourne Except I Wake Up on Merry Go Rounds

By season 9 it’s a struggle to think, “If this character didn’t die, if Dan doesn’t shoot them, then what might they do, where would they be now?”

By season 9 you start wondering, “Is 9 years too much, too many to care about? And when some of the ensemble leave to start families with secondary characters from other TV shows, will the audience care who you introduce next? That guy from Laguna Beach or the one from Lipstick Jungle?”

So when Jack asks if he’s like Jason Bourne, even remotely, the answer should be, “Matt Damon’s not even Bourne now, and if he’s not, the slot’s open, it’s a conveyor belt anyway, which might just work if you wake up on roundabouts.”

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