It was a double-take eye catch. I almost missed you. But, instead, I bravely made the kiss move, to European greet you, and you reciprocated. We said a wow and are you busy? And you weren’t, despite history. So we left the DVD shop I don’t think you’d be in really. What were you, buying one of your own Blu-rays or something?

Next was a series of saves, legendary dolphin Jesus moves, which only princes in movies make. And to wake was the disappointment of truth-telling Santa, 50p tooth fairy pieces in my mother’s hands, the pillow puff-crease next to me.