Jack says, “Brad Pitt dates a lot of people. He’s dated lots of them. He settles sometimes but sometimes I think that it’s only in cycles, and we’re ready for the next one nearly.”

I list other examples I think are better – Jude Law, Colin Farrell, Bradley Cooper – but Jack doesn’t listen, instead asks “What’s your favourite film of his?”

“The River Runs Through It,” I tell him.

Jack replies, “What?” then quotes Fight Club then picks up a kitchen knife and mimics Brad’s character from Basterds.